Dark Glass Ponderings

For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. -1 Corinthians 13:12

I have just started what promises to be a new learning season for me, homeschooling my daughter.  Its hard for me to believe tomorrow I would be putting her on the yellow bus, yet I know that is not God's plan for me right now.

Homeschooling is a tool in God's hands to try to teach me.  May I be moldable clay in His hands.  I close my eyes and ask for patience one last time as we try to "sound out" the word for the umpteenth time.  How did she understand this yesterday and not today?  God uses this to remind me how patient He is with me.

I pray for a new way to share the same thing.  God gives me new eyes to see.  My daughter is not me.  He is schooling me in the ways she learns: by exploring, by watching, by ever observing.  This girl who can sit and watch an ant for 15 minutes ever observant of every movement.

He shows me that He wants me to be ever learning, ever questionning.  Finding out more about Him and His word.  My daughter asks endless questions.  God wants to teach me humility at her hands.  We "google" endless questions and I wonder what kind of Kindergarten education did I have?

He wants to teach me to die to self.  She is always wanting to learn more and more.  Begging for the homeschooling time to be stretched.  As my son naps those rare few moments of semi-quiet.  I long for a nap, some quiet writing time, or curling up with a good book.  Yet when I "surrender" to this season of motherhood I am rewarded by priceless bunny snuggles and SOMETHING MORE.

Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child shall in no wise enter therein.-Luke 18:17

Lord, give me a child's heart.  Cast down my pride and clothe me in humility.  Give me a curious heart, begging to know more of You.  Give me an honest heart, ever confessing my sins before you.  Give me a pure heart with right motives.  Give me an all-embracing loving heart.  Give me an infectious joy.  Most of all help me to hold tight to You and never let go through all the trials of life.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. -James 1:17


Julia, I can say as a homeschool graduate after 12 years at home, you will NOT regret this decision. I couldn't be more thankful to God or my family that I was homeschooled. Let me give you one example:

My senior year of high school I took an FFA class (Future Farmers of America) and was so thoroughly ready to leave when the semester was over. And I was there one day a week. I will be completely honest here: I wasted the time I spent in class, I am not saying the class was a waste, I had a great time in the competetions I was in, but the class itself was a waste of my time. I learned nothing, except what the public school system wants to indoctrinate you with.

I took an aptitude test, because I had to, and was later told due to the results that I come across as selfish and stingy. Generally not a people person. I might not be that way, but that is how I come across. O-kay. But that is what they are teaching. That everyone fits into a mold, immerse them in lies that the system believes. Treat em and street em. And the treatment is worse the disease.

Your daughter will thank you, you will thank God that He placed this on your heart and in the end, as my mom would say, who would you rather have educating and influencing your daugther, you or a bunch of other kindergartners?

I will pray for your peace of mind and praise you for listening to His direction!

Home schooling can be hard, but I think it has its own advantages to public schooling. Good luck to both of you! :)

Great scripture. Just what I needed to read on my first day back to school today. Thanks Julia. :)



Thanks so much for the encouragement. It was much needed. I've heard stories like yours about kids going into the public schools and not learning too much after being at home.

You are definitely not selfish and stingy!! I can most certainly tell that just from seeing you online!! You are one of the most encouraging people I have met online.

Thank you for praying, too! In this new season I most certainly need to stay on course! But He is faithful who called me is what I need to remember, even when I feel inadequate.

@ Ariel, Thanks for the encouragement.

@Joy, I'm glad it was encouraging to you! Thanks!

Julia, this post is so eloquent. I pray God will continue to guide you in His ways as you homeschool. I feel your prayer both as a parent and as a Sunday School teacher.

Thanks for stopping by my blog today. The book is "Betsy Ross and The Making of America" by Marla R. Miller, published this year. I found it at my local library and knew I wanted to own it. Fortunately I found a super deal on it a couple of months ago. I've been kind of saving it, like the last piece of a delicious cake. Now's the right time for me to read it. I need a break from fiction every now and then!

Blessings to you!

Hey Jules-

I can't think of a better teacher for your daughter than you.

I still contemplate the homeschooling thing, but it's not for us at this this time!

To Casey- there are also a lot of great things about public schooling. What kind of "indoctrination" do you believe goes on in kindergarten? Sheesh.

Julia M. Reffner

About Me

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Christ-loving bookworm & homeschool mom of 2 stealing the rare quiet moments to pursue that all elusive writing dream. I also write book reviews for Title Trakk and The Historical Novel Society.


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